Inaugural ‘Out of the Darkness' walk raises $29,000

Money will be used to fund research and education programs to prevent suicide and save lives CENTRAL VALLEY - The release of helium balloons into a bright blue sky last Sunday morning at Monroe-Woodbury High School was more than just creating a rainbow of color in the air. It was a celebration of the lives lost to suicide. The inaugural Orange County “Out of the Darkness” Walk to benefit the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP) has raised $29,000 as of Wednesday to support the foundation’s research and education programs to prevent suicide and save lives, increase awareness about depression and suicide and assist survivors of suicide loss. The AFSP established a Hudson Valley chapter last January, headquartered in Poughkeepsie, which serves Orange, Dutchess, Putnam, Rockland, Sullivan and Ulster counties. Almost 300 people participated in the event, which began at dawn with the lighting of luminaries for a private Family/Friends Memorial Walk, followed by a two-mile walk around a course at the high school and Central Valley Elementary School. ‘A lasting impression’ The number of people who attended pleased Monroe resident Ann Marie D’Aliso, a foundation member of the Patrick M. D’Aliso Foundation, which was established after D’Aliso’s son Patrick committed suicide in 2004. The D’Aliso Foundation served as host of the event. “It tells me there are a lot of people who are dealing with this in their families,” said D’Aliso, who is also the founder of a support group for survivors of suicide. “It’s the last taboo that no one wants to talk about. What we want to do is to let everyone know it’s (suicide) a sickness. No one in their right mind does this. Until we look at this as something seriously wrong, only then can we address the problem and get help to those who are suffering. It’s against all human nature to want to kill yourself.” Participants even included people like Chester resident Kim Marra, who had not lost any family members or friends to suicide. “The reason why I did it was because when I was young, I watched an Oprah show and there was a mother talking about how her son killed himself in the backyard because he was being bullied in school,” she said. “It left a lasting impression on me. It bothers me that children are killing themselves. It would help if other people knew the signs that people wanted to kill themselves.” Marra was grateful to the people who sponsored her: “I was very surprised how many people supported me and I didn’t have anyone who died. They didn’t ask any questions. They just did it.” A son, a wife, a father D’Aliso, who served as the event’s keynote speaker, told her story to walkers that morning, hoping to let them know they were not alone in what happened to their loved ones or friends. “I refuse to keep silent about it,” she said. “My son was a wonderful boy. He was a wrestler. He never gave us any trouble. But he had lost his girlfriend, he had mono and he had a speeding ticket and the car was taken away from him. The next day, he killed himself.” She hoped telling her story would remind others to stay vigilant about any changes they see in their family members or friends. In particular, she recently spent time in the high school talking to students about taking care to notice any changes in their friends’ behavior. “I told them, ‘You are their friends,’” she said. “’You talk to each other. If you see your friend is not acting right, say something. Your friend may be mad at you, but at least your friend will be here the next day.’” The rawness of suicide never goes away, as evidenced by those who participated last Sunday. “I met a man who was at the walk who lost his wife to suicide just a week ago,” said D’Aliso. “I met a woman who had tears in her eyes and told me she lost her dad to suicide when she was 15, and now she’s 40. She told me, ‘Thank you. I can now celebrate my father’s death.’ That made it rewarding.”

It’s the last taboo that no one wants to talk about. What we want to do is to let everyone know it’s (suicide) is a sickness.’ Monroe resident Ann Marie D’Aliso, whose son Patrick committed suicide in 2004 and whose family has since created a foundation in Patrick’s name to support research and education programs to prevent suicide.

Survivors of suicide support group• Have you lost a loved one or friend to suicide? A support group for survivors of suicide, sponsored by the Patrick M. D’Aliso Foundation, meets the second Tuesday of the month at the First Presbyterian Church, 94-96 Main St., in Chester at 7 p.m. • Enter at the back of the church at its education building. Call Ann Marie D’Aliso at 325-6448 for further information.