Foundation seeks to stop bullying while increasing kindness

Kindness Above Malice Foundation honors the memory of Monroe resident Kameron Jacobsen, By Nancy Kriz MONROE - Kameron Jacobsen wrote rap music and loved to play video games. He enjoyed Nickelodeon Channel shows and learned about the world by watching the Discovery Channel. This young man always wore Ugg moccasins and munched on McDonald’s Happy Meals in the backseat of the car while listening to Cudi, Eminem, Miles Davis or the Zack Brown Band on his iPod. Kameron loved baseball, sometimes wore his baseball cap backwards and was a member of the Monroe-Woodbury Little League. And like many others, he was a dedicated - though frustrated - New York Mets fan. His sister took him to midnight movie premieres and sometimes to “haunted buildings.” He loved movies like “Saving Private Ryan” and “Toy Story 3D” and “Cool Hand Luke.” Kameron loved Halloween and Christmas and four was his favorite number. He loved to eat Ramen noodles, Chef Boyardee ravioli and Stouffer’s turkey dinners as well as Fluff and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. The 14-year-old Monroe-Woodbury High School freshman once stole his grandmother’s car and drove it around the block while his parents were at work, and was certainly a bit wiser after they learned of his unauthorized joyride. Kameron’s friends meant everything to him. Basement parties at the family home with “Kameron and his 'krew’” were filled with good times and fun. But, his family said, he was also a victim of bullying. His death last Jan. 18 was a shock to everyone who knew and loved him and rattled a community which was still grieving from the similar death of another high school student about a week earlier. Kindness Above Malice The pain of her son’s death is still like an open wound to Monroe resident Wanda Jacobsen. A friend said it’s still too difficult for her to talk to unfamiliar people about what happened to Kameron. But she did want people to know about her son and the foundation created in his memory: Kindness Above Malice, or “KAM,” in honor of Kameron’s nickname of “Kam.” She also expressed her gratitude about the April 30 fund raiser organized by Goshen resident Barbara Morrison and Wanda Jacobsen’s friends at Morrison’s Monroe-based “My Salon” on Route 17M from 1 to 8 p.m. All proceeds will benefit KAM. Organizers hope to raise enough money to establish seed money which will allow KAM to create anti-bullying and kindness awareness programs and scholarship opportunities. The Jacobsen family said that bullying was something Kameron first experienced while as a member of a spring baseball travel team in middle school. “It was during one of those travel team practices that Kameron, weighing all of 72 pounds, became the victim of a brutal assault by a bully,” his father Kevin Jacobsen Sr. wrote in an essay posted on KAM’s Web site. 'Began to quietly withdraw’ As a high school freshman, Kameron had a 90-pound frame and knew he was small, his father wrote, adding his son wanted to grow to be able to defend himself against cowards and stop the comments and the insults in school. Jacobsen wrote that Kameron’s report cards said mostly “pleasure to have in class” with a few “missing homework assignments” as comments from his teachers. Kameron wanted to have perfect attendance in high school but became reluctant to even go to school. He looked forward to snow days instead of “being victimized in the hallways or the cafeteria,” according to his father. “He began to quietly withdraw from us and on my birthday in 2010 he broke down and told us he was being bullied both in school and over the Internet,” Jacobsen wrote. “One was intertwined with the other as we now know.” In an e-mail to The Photo News, Kameron’s father also wrote it was important for people to know about his son. “If you knew Kameron, you knew the best of what we all wish for our children and for ourselves to become,” Jacobsen wrote. “He was funny and compassionate. He had integrity as strong as iron, recognizing the corruption and apathy that oftentimes hijacks our society.” Jacobsen wrote that while Kameron was bullied and embarrassed, he “would want us to do everything we can to now save others in similar situations.” 'Positive, sustainable change’ The foundation’s purpose, according to Kameron’s father, is to join with other organizations “dedicated to fostering an understanding and causing a dialogue that prevents another teen, indeed another family, the abject pain of teen suicide as a result of this inadequacy. Our purpose is to bring about positive, sustainable change at the local level first and embrace its dual focus both long term and immediate.” The foundation’s importance, he wrote in his e-mail, is “that everyone can help prevent and stop bullying if they make that choice. Our responsibility as adults is to protect, nurture and be that role model for kids, teens, and young adults. As a foundation we intend to get that message out and assist in any way we can.” Jacobsen felt the issue of bullying is not a big enough focus in area schools and communities. “During the course of the past six months, the consequences of bullying have become more and more prevalent to us as we journey this painful and difficult realization, that the need for addressing this issue is not being met in our schools and communities,” he wrote in his e-mail. “... Everyone has the right to feel safe in their community, in their schools or when they are online.” On KAM’s Web site, Kameron’s father reminded people his son was just like any other young boy who was growing up and taking a look at what life had to offer him. “He is the same as any young boy or girl,” he wrote. “They are all loved; they are all our sons and daughters. They all have dreams, they all have fears. They sometimes cry and sometimes hide their tears.”

If you go
My Salon fund raiser to benefit the Kindness Above Malice Foundation
Saturday, April 30 from 1 to 8 p.m. at My Salon on Route 17M in Monroe.
Organizers said 100 percent of the salon services proceeds will benefit the foundation that day.
Prices: Manicures, $10 (regularly $15); chair and foot massages: $1 per minute; eye brow waxing: $7 (regularly $10 to $12); and lip waxing: $5 (regularly $8), Haircut prices: Boys - $10; girls/ short hair - $14; and girls/long hair-$16. Bang trims are free.
Raffle tickets, featuring prizes donated by area businesses and restaurants, are $1 and can also be purchased at the salon in advance, Tuesday through Saturday.
inner need not be present to win.
For more information, call 782-2272.

Can you help?
Contributions can be sent to: Kindness Above Malice, P.O. Box 561, Harriman, N.Y. 10926